To be divine is to be whole. To be whole is to be complete, the evil and the good.
As my layoff from my 2 years of working in auto insurance nears (I will not disclose the company’s name at this time…cause I’m still working until this layoff, cause I want to ensure my severance pay is direct deposit.) I have come to a conclusion that I would rather jump off a 50 story building while holding a gun to my head, while I plummet to a solid concrete ground with giant chards of glass surrounded by under fed, starved, violent and ferocious lions waiting close by to eat my mangled body; rather than get another J.O.B.
Seriously. No joke. Yep. Cause to me going back will be the death of my freedom to express creatively. It would be the death of the spirit. And plus I want to be sure to get the job done. Ha! I was one of the fortunate but unfortunate individuals to get caught up with customer service rep and sales rep on their resume.
Those who work customer service now or sales or collections can relate. It’s a vicious cycle of employment to break. With these J.O.Bs it’s a gruesome duty to be polite and apologetic all day to everyone. .. Including assholes. What job is complete without those assholes?! Excuse my choice of words but I’m not sorry for saying it. I surely DO NOT APOLOGIZE.
Not to mention that it’s always a haggle and hassle to constantly watch the clock. And with me, being the person that I am, punctuality is my enemy. Then on top of that there are the countless technical difficulties that could not be explained. Then customers would constantly try countless ways to receive free or pay less for coverage. Then I also I deal with clueless agents whose job you have to do as well. BLAH….BLAH…BLAH…BLAH…AND SOME MORE BLAH…
I don’t even want to write all that to be honest.
But back to the point of me writing this. *Sigh* I recall a very good friend of mine told me the acronym of J.O.B. The real meaning of it. My friend is now deceased for the past 4 years but I still hear his voice like he’s right next me. The acronym of JOB is just over broke.
That really resonated with me until this day as you’re reading this. As I reminisce my days of employment and also my days of unemployment from corporate I’ve come to feel my best unemployed. Yea I may not have a bi weekly income, but my outside expenses are not as great. It’s funny how we invest so many hours for a mediocre, sometimes grueling wage, and once we are paid we are too tired to enjoy it or we have many expenditures that must be paid.
I’M WORKING TO JUST GO TO WORK. Great.
This is not how I envisioned my life as a child.
I really have aspirations and dreams of becoming better and doing more. I have inspirations of becoming well off financially until I will be able to help and make others around me financially secure. Because with me working on someone else’s time is really limiting my income dramatically.
Plus, I enjoy the thought of me being completely free from someone else clock. I desire to enjoy every hour, minute and second of the day doing what I love to do freely and contribute something back to society at the same time.
I see others do it every day. I know I have the ability to accomplish that as well.
It’s not that I don’t like my co-workers…because I do. They’re great people. I just don’t enjoy the confinement and redundant tasks.
This is How I see myself…
but with a bottle of Jack Daniels whiskey in one hand and bag of weed in the other. HA HA HAaaa! (Don’t Judge me).
Anyways…Aside from my long-term life goals. I just wish to live my life to the fullest with the talent I have been given. I wish to live my life. Not to just survive. I wish to be divine. To be divine is to be complete. The evil and the good.